WHAT’S YOUR REFUSAL STYLE?

Part of finding your SKY is being able to know when something is not for you and learning how to say “No” to it. 

Lakini pia, inaweza kuwa hard to just say “NO”. Whether you’re telling your friend hauwezi hang out or saying no thanks to a boy who wants you to do something you don’t like, rejecting someone inaweza feel mean or rude. However, saying "yes" when you don't want to or when you know that it’s not your thing will get in the way of of you being who you are.

Uzuri, this is a skill unaweza learn. And the best way to make saying “NO” less uncomfortable is to say it in a way that is suited to your personality. 

Time to breakdown 4 main personality types for SKY girls na the best way to say “NO” for each of them.

 

BLUE SKY Personality

This is a SKY girl who is…

True blue and boss too. A capable and reliable chic who is focused on a brilliant future. The world is not ready. You are a Blue SKY kama you: 

• Hold yourself to high standards.
• Reserved in nature lakini can be funny! Sometimes it takes a while for others to get your humor because it's on the dark side, or flavored with sarcasm.
• A dependable friend. You'll probably keep many of your high school friends hata after mumalize.
• In control of yourself. Uko obsessed with making the best use of your time and resources.
• Often given many responsibilities, because you're trusted and can handle it. Your good name at school or within your family is a source of pride.

Blue SKY refusal style is…

Direct but kind. Kama “no” sounds too harsh for you, try something that feels softer. “Aki si kwa ubaya, but doing that si kitu I want for myself. I’m good, thanks.” or “I don't think it’s for me. Just not my thing.” are some options. Or if you can commit to only part of something, try “Siwezi fanya the entire thing, but I can help with a specific part.”

 

SILVER SKY Personality

This is a SKY girl who is…

…a chill sister! Always cool, calm and collected. You are super-independent and very creative...such a vibe! You are a Silver SKY kama you:

• Are naturally chill na unapenda ku-laugh a lot na ku-lift the mood with your friends.
• You're an opinion leader. Unajua ku-motivate your pals bila trying too hard.
• Are able to encourage others. 
• Have contagious confidence which means watu wanafeel like they can be their best selves around you

Silver  SKY refusal style is…

Relaxed and clever. Sana sana, you might feel like you have  to immediately say “yes” to a request when they are put on the spot. Ukijipata hapo, the best thing to do is to be your creative self and make light of the situation. For example, unaweza sema, “ Heh! So that my mum finds out na niwekwe for adoption? No thanks. Lol!” A laugh will help you get out of saying yes to something that is not for you.

 

ORANGE SKY Personality

This is a SKY girl who is…

…the fiery girlie of the sistahood :) You have a lot of energy, courage and charisma plus your friends and your friends admire you! You are an Orange SKY kama you

• Should have vibrant as your middle name.
• You’ve got a big personality, na the will to make a big impact. 
• Have a lot of energy, and and look for physically-charged activities that get you excited
• Are charismatic, confident, a natural leader, and competitive. 
• You've got a big heart.

Orange  SKY refusal style is…

Warm and courageous. Not really ready to say “no”? No problem. Unaweza build your courage through courage-giving introductions. Hizi ni words or a phrases that a person can practice saying before they come out and say ‘no.’ For example: “This is really hard for me to say, lakini I have to be honest ...” or “I know this may offend or piss you off, but the reason siwezi ni …” Hizi intros help ku-build courage to give your reason.

 

PINK SKY Personality

This is a SKY girl who is…

Pink and sweet! Your personality is fun, spontaneous and cheerful! You love a challenge and so you always have the best stories. You are a Pink SKY if you:

• Are sensitive. Lakini hose who know you will soon learn that you are strong too
• Take your time with friendship so u-build trust. 
• Are trustworthy and good at keeping secrets
• Have a vibe of being cuddly, sincere and sweet
• Create a little family of friends at school in which to feel safe
• Are nurturing, and that caring makes you a good listener to friends or even a parent.

PINK SKY refusal style is…

Patient and soft. The truth is bad news is always going to be bad news, but ikisemwa with consideration, it can be better. That’s where your softness shine. Unaweza sema thanks before declining. For example, if you are turning down an invitation, you might want to say something like, “Thanks for thinking of me, lakini I won’t be able to attend.”