Take The Pledge Today


5th September 2022

1. Nikiambia my partner no, they think I don’t trust them.

  1. No! They always respect my choices.
  2. Yes, ni kama siwezi have boundaries bila ku offend them.

2. Do you find it easy to talk to your partner when you feel wamekukosea?

  1. Yes, tunaweza talk about anything.
  2. No, I get nervous to tell them juu they don’t take criticism well.

3. Sometimes I feel unsafe around my partner, like ata niingiza kwa mashida. 

  1. No! They would never want me to get hurt physically, mentally or emotionally.
  2. Yes, siko sure kama they always have my best interest at heart.

4. My partner akona mood swings! Some days they’re really sweet and on others they shout at me or ignore me.

  1. Never! Kama ana have a bad day ataniambia roho safi but not be mean.
  2. Yes! Anaweza ni kasirikia bure.

5. My partner knows my boundaries (like not wanting to have sex) and never forces issues.

  1. Yes, hawezi niuliza kufanya vitu that they know I wouldn’t do and they respect consent.
  2. No, they don’t even know my values and are constantly pressuring me to do things yenye sitaki kufanya.

6. My partner makes me feel insecure, they either compare me to others or criticize me directly. 

  1. Never! Ana ni make ku-feel like the most beautiful person in the world!
  2. Yes! They either compare me to others or make mean comments about me.

7. I feel like the relationship is one-sided and I put in all the effort.

  1. No, we both put the same effort.
  2. Yes, I always do the most na ninapata bare minimum in return.

8. My partner has physically hurt me before.

  1. Never ever!!
  2. Yes, even if it was just once.

9. When I bring up breaking up, my partner gets very emotional and tries to emotionally manipulate me.

  1. No. They say that I should do what inanifurahisha and ata understand.
  2. Yes! Either ata anza kulia ama kuji-victimize saying things like “I’m good for nothing”, “I don’t even deserve you” etc.

10. My partner is possessive, controlling and wants me to be around them all the time instead of having a life of my own.

  1. Eh zi, they think it’s important to have a life outside of each other.
  2. Yes! We’re always together and I don’t really have close friends other than them.

If you got mostly As:

You are in a healthy relationship! Baki tu hivo. Relationships are about accepting each other, supporting each other and being there for each other and that’s what you have. 

Mostly Bs:

Hii relationship ni Toxic! Partner wako ana ku-tear down instead of lifting you up. Kama una feel unsafe or you want to talk through things with someone, bonga confidentially na One2One on 1190 (Toll-Free)